taxonomites | 005 ∞ [visual || location: Amy's House]

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005 ∞ [visual || location: Amy's House]

The tablet turns on and all one can see for a moment is Amy's blurry hand before she moves it back to pick up her fork. She's eating a salad, and the glitched vegetables are making her want to spout as many lies from her lips as she can.

"This ice cream is amaaaaazing," she says, tilting her bowl away from the tablet that's propped up on a couple cookbooks, though the close observer would have already seen the leafy greens.

"Much better than any you guys get from the hatch. I tweaked it, using the Doctor's sonic screwdriver, to give me better tasting food."

She twirled her fork in the air. "You know, these hamsters aren't so bad once you get to know them. I played bridge with a couple last night and then we went to karaoke. The big brown and white one can't carry a tune, but that's all right. He paid for my drinks, so that makes up for being tone deaf."

Propping her leg up on the kitchen table, the tablet goes clacking against the table surface, filming the ceiling.

"Oi, did you guys feel that? Taxon just had an earthquake." One could hear the sound of Amy crunching on lettuce and croutons for a moment before her other leg joined the first on the table and the tablet shook.

"Whoops. Aftershocks."

[ooc: I'm taking advantage of the glitched foods to make Amy a liar. She's going to lie about everything your characters try to talk to her about for two hours.]

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Kate giggled at first, then quirked a brow at Amy's face in the tablet.

"Amy...you okay?"

Picking up the tablet, Amy peered closely at it, then rolled her eyes. "Ugh, no. I feel awful. Like, my head's all stuffed up, and I lost an arm in the war and I still get phantom pains there."

Kate can clearly see both of Amy's arms, so she snorts.

"Okay. Which arm did you lose, in what war?"

"The left one. In the... Crimean War. Yeah, it was blown off by a nuclear grenade. Very messy."

She shrugged like this "loss" was no big deal, and continued with her salad.

Kate hid her smile behind her hand, not entirely sure if Amy was joking or not.

"So, is that a prosthetic arm, or did yours grow back?"

"Grew back. Like a starfish. I'm a medical marvel."

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"Bridge? Why would you play bridge? You're not a doddering old woman, last I checked!"

There is a laugh. Herc always thinks he's hilarious.

"'Course I am! I'm as old as the Doctor, and he's 900, no, he's 1,000!" She spears a piece of lettuce and eats it noisily.

"What's going on with you today?"

"Oh, the usual. Working out, keeping things vaguely tidy, enjoying the weather."

"There's a snowstorm coming," she said matter-of-factly. "Three feet of snow, at least. And hail. Most likely tornadoes too."

There is a long pause.

"...that is a very awful storm."

He sounds as if he thinks she's being quite odd.

"Mmm. Bet you could stop it though. Being a god and all." There's a noise as she takes her feet off the table. "I've met gods before. One invited me in for tea, but I had other things to do."

You've spoken to the hamsters? [Martha's eyes widened in astonishment, automatically wary of their furry captors but eager to find out what they might have said.] What did they ..?

[And then Amy mentions a non existent earthquake. And reveals that she's eating a salad, not ice cream. Right.]

... Amy? What's going on?

What do you mean? In this place, there's just so much going on. No day is filled with the boring humdrum of being a prisoner under lock and key. Nope, not at all.

You're not eating ice cream, you're eating a salad. And Taxon definitely hasn't had an earthquake. So why are you saying that it did?

Did you talk to the hamsters?

[Maybe they'd tweaked her mind during the karaoke.]

[She frowns and sets her bowl aside.]

Do you know what? I think you're just jealous that a hamster in a fetching fedora bought me drinks all night. Well, not all night. We went water skiing down the Thames afterward.

I'm not jealous, I'm worried.

[And, at the moment, her worry was increasing every time Amy opened her mouth.]

Where are you, Amy?

In the Caribbean, soaking up the sun.

No, Mary, Queen of Scots. Hello!

Are you feeling all right?

Oh, I can't feel anything. I've gone completely numb, you see.

Have you?

"No, William Wallace." She lifted a fist in the air. "FREEEEEEDOM!" Laughing at herself, she lowered her arm. "What's up?"

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