taxonomites | 004 ;; [ VISUAL ] not all that it seems

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004 ;; [ VISUAL ] not all that it seems

Usually Ashley could find herself a rooftop to sit upon and think, to work through whatever was bothering her or to calm from her mental beating if something had gone wrong. Here, despite their being plenty of rooftops to choose from it didn't quite seem appropriate. The situation was different, wildly different from anything that they, particularly her, had previously encountered and her normal quiet reflection didn't seem fitting. Especially in the middle of the day.

She'd collected her bike a little earlier, not feeling her usual drive as she rode it back to the Sanctuary before taking a lone walk in the middle of Osten. Forgoing the use of the trains, Ashley had tried to free her mind and let herself just walk; to finally explore this place which as trying to become home. Neither of those things had worked and eventually Ashley stopped, standing in the middle of whichever street she'd found herself in. People went about their day, barely bothering to give her a glance.

The previous night had been hard and Ashley had found herself unable to sleep; nothing about their lives or what they did had ever had this effect on her, yet none of them had ever been experimented on before. She'd gone through her usual morning routine, trying to feel like herself: she looked the part, but Ashley didn't see herself looking back in the mirror. Pain had come with her anger as did the reminder of what she was. Her mother hadn't yet done any tests or scans which was one reason as to why Ashley had left. Coming to terms with what had happened was something that Ashley believed would be hard to accept or come to terms with. Seeing it happen to someone else was one thing, but to yourself? It wasn't something that Ashley had ever imagined.

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"Well I think you've got me beat on that." On the naming and the number. How someone could have so many wasn't quite that fathomable.

"Guilt gifts from dad?" Claire smirked, unable to hide the bitter amusement that came along with overthinking this. "I've got everyone beat on that."

Picking up on that bitterness wasn't hard to do. Ashley had had a similar feeling, though for different feelings but without any amusement in it. Trust her world getting thrown apart to make her rethink things.

"Guilt gifts?" For now, she'd ignore herself and talk about Claire.

"Yeah, every time he went away for a while, I'd get a bear," Claire explained, thinking back to her first bear. Her 'Uncle' Claude had given her that one, and then her dad had taken the idea and ran with it. She had a whole collection at home, some at college and some still at the house. "It was supposed to make up for missing the school play, or the Christmas concert, whatever."

"Doesn't sound like a bear would do that." Maybe when you were five, or eight but not for that long after. That was something that her mom had never done; missed something important. No matter the importance of her work, she'd always been there for Ashley. Her father could never be compared to anything, since no situation was comparable to that.

She shrugged, thinking it over. "They helped a little," she admitted, wondering if Ashley would think less of her for taking the bribe. "I liked that no matter where he was, he'd stop whatever he was doing to pick out a bear for me. It made me feel like he'd missed me as much as I'd missed him."

Well what did she know? "That actually sounds nice."

"It was nicer than him leaving and not bringing back a guilt gift," Claire agreed. "Are you okay, Ashley? Because you seem kinda...not."

And here came the thing. Being honest wouldn't stop her questioning, but not telling her wouldn't help either, because Claire would know something was wrong since she already did.

"Not particularly."

She nodded, having expected that or worse. Ashley wasn't avoiding the question altogether, so that was something. "Is there anything I can do?"

"I don't-" And Ashley stopped herself. What did she want, other than this to go away? Not thinking about it for a while might be nice and while it didn't change anything, it did what she was hoping for.

"Good at distractions?"

"Are you kidding? Avoiding my life used to be the only thing I was good at," she admitted. Although that made her think about what she might have been better at now, and nothing really came to mind. "I'm indestructible." Peter had probably told everyone about it after she'd healed him. She didn't see the harm in cluing Ashley in if she didn't already know.

"Indestructible?" She could believe that. "Alright then.."

"Yeah..." Claire confirmed, finding that the biggest surprise was how well Ashley was taking that one. Gretchen had been cool about it too, but with a little more excitement than she could handle. Ashley just treated it like it was normal. "I found out when I was almost sixteen, and ever since then my life has been one weird thing after another. And everytime I try to distract myself with something that normal people do, it backfires like you wouldn't believe."

"Well that doesn't sound hopeful." Here though there might be less things that could screw it up.

"What did you try?"

"My most recent thing was college," she laughed to herself, because Ashley was right. She'd lost her optimism about trying new things. Getting abducted by aliens definitely had made her rethink the whole fight for a 'normal' life. "I'm thinking I missed too much work to salvage this semester now, even if I could get out.

"You went to college as a distraction?" There was no way that Ashley was trying that. If they were home, well they wouldn't be having this discussion but would bagging abnormals be enough? For once she didn't think so.

"No, I went for the education," Claire explained, wanting to start with that so Ashley didn't think she was just doing it to run away from her life. It hadn't been like that at all. "But part of it was wanting to start over. You know, reinventing yourself as the person you'd like to be?"

"Oh." Now that made a bit more sense. "I was fine with the person I was."

"I spent too much time trying to hide who I was." Hopefully Ashley would understand that now that she knew about her ability. "People aren't supposed to know that you can survive jumping out of a window."

That she knew far too well. "That's why my mom made the Sanctuary: to protect abnormals who need it." And to hide the dangerous. People did not need to know about those.

"That's what they tell me," Claire replied with a nod. It wasn't that she didn't believe them, because she did. She just thought you couldn't protect abnormals in the building where Sylar lived without people getting hurt. "Did you grow up in this place?"

Ashley nodded back. "Mom had the place a long time before me. It came with perfect hiding places for when you're kid though."

"Hiding places? I'd get lost and never find my way out," Claire laughed. The Sanctuary was, well, huge. She stuck to the floors she was starting to get familiar with and didn't go far beyond that. The tablet would be useful if she got lost, but she didn't want to have to ask anyone for help. Peter would end up laughing at her.

"Possibly one of the only advantages to growing up here; knowing all the secret entrances, paths and not getting lost." She had as a child, but not anymore and not for a long time.

004 ;; [ VISUAL ] not all that it seems

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